Its like the world stood still but no one noticed.

October 8, 2005 was not eons ago. I can still feel it happening in my insides and I miss my home, my Kashmir and my love. I don't think I will ever forget it but I don't know when I will talk about it.

Chris Cornell can rip you up and then some.

I have seen angels fall from blinding heights, and you yourself are nothing so divine, just next in line. Calm yourself, because no one else here will save you, the odds will betray you.

If you love me, won't you let me know?

Was a long and dark December
From the rooftops I remember
There was snow
White snow

Clearly I remember
From the windows they were watching
While we froze
Down below

When the future's architectured
By a carnival of idiots on show
You'd better lie low

If you love me
Won't you let me know?

Was a long and dark December
When the banks became cathedrals
And the fog
Became God

Priests clutched onto bibles
Hollowed out to fit their rifles
And the cross was held aloft

Bury me in armor
When I'm dead and hit the ground
A love back home unfolds

If you love me
Won't you let me know?

I don't want to be a soldier
Who the captain of some sinking ship
Would stow, far below

So if you love me
Why'd you let me go?

I took my love down to Violet Hill
There we sat in snow
All that time she was silent still

So if you love me
Won't you let me know?

If you love me,
Won't you let me know?

- CP.

You've gotta stand for something or you'll fall for anything.Fall for anything.

What a whirlwind!M is here with the family and so our house is full of way too many people at any given time. Its so hard to get work done and hence, I didn't , because I am an ass that way. My essay sucked and my midterm was atrocious and none of that is funny shit. I am basically screwed if I don't pull my socks and just get into it. I have a research paper and 2 exams to redeem myself and restore any remnants of a dignity that I have left. I am sure that both of my profs see me as a loser now, and actually a stupid loser. Regardless, I am not losing at life and so all the remaining course work will rock(INSHALLAHx999999999999).

I am currently beaming because I am a stupid teenager caught in a 20something's body. But yeah, how do we say, pathetic?Convesations should never make a person this happy unless that person is an idiot, or me. MCAT course ends tmrw and the test is fast approaching. I am sad that I haven't studied as much as I could and should have. This time though, no stone is going to be left unturned. I love my playlist and I love the script and cold play and Beerah and school. Although, parts of neuro do make me want to shoot myself in the eye and observe the neuronal activity. Ugh, life.

I'm on a boat and It's going fast and I got a nautical themed Pashmina Afghan.

INTENSE. Summer school is one crazy ass ride. Even D, who was all chirpy and excited about is, is swamped. Back-to-back assignments and exams plus prep sessions are totally uncool. I am enjoying the learning though, hah-most days that is. Hope I didn't screw up the tuesday exam(AMEN AMEN AMEEEEN). I love seeing Beerah though. She is so precious and cute-ey. S thinks that I need to stop stalking the little jaan but she is just the gorgeousness and such a poser. Bless, Bless!!

How do you make up for passion?

Petrarch had passion. He had so much of passion and love for Cicero that he wrote letters to him and even to Aristotle. He wrote a whole 3-act dialogue between him and Augustine. Augustine lived and died a 1000 years before him. I feel like I don't have that kind of passion and maybe thats why things feel harder to me. I don't have that instinct and that un-relenting love for anything, anymore. Maybe, the whole Mersault-esque life has made me just that, an ice queen. Petrarch was a humanist and they believe in leaving some kind of a mark in the world to remind people of themselves. I want to leave a mark too, a good one, a great one. I know that I have the love, the passion, the drive and even the blood lust for it, I just need to use it to get the wheels in motion.

New Day.